I initially wasn’t going to take this challenge, but I decided, “Ehh. Let’s give it a try.”
So, here it is. My two second teaser retrospective on a (not full) year blogging:
April 29, 2016 – A New Year
The new year has come – a brand new three hundred and sixty five days. My master, Hugo Pebberdash, travels through the year the same as everyone else.
But he is different from everyone else. He spends the year with me.
In wonderful stories.
All written across my glowing screen…
April 30, 2016 – Worst Blind Date
I ran to my bedroom, cursing and swearing in German. Why did I have to share my apartment with a manic pixie girl? My next roommate will be someone sensible. Someone not given to whims of—“Where are my nylons?”
“They looked sad. So, I set them free.”
I froze. “You did what?”
“I opened the door and told them to go join their wild cousins. They didn’t move. So, I threw them out the door.”
I stuck my head out of my room. “You ditz! Those were my only nylons!”
I pulled out my purple leggings. They would look horrible with my only cute dress, but—“Where’s my sundress?”
“You know! The yellow one with—Oh. Good.” I put it on. Sure enough, it looked awful with my leggings. Absolutely awful. I pulled my hair into a quick ponytail, slipped into my high heels, and returned to the living room.
Cassie squealed with delight. “Oh, what an adorkable look.”
I ignored her upside down insult. “Let’s get this over with.”…
May 5, 2016 – Mom’s Secret
“Let me tell you a story.”
“Is it a good story?”
“It is a true story. Once upon a time, there was a girl who lived under the sea. She swam with dolphins and sang with sea turtles, but she wasn’t happy. Her heart yearned for something, but she had no name for her yearning. She searched the seven seas, but she did not find it. She dove to the depths and asked the wise sea urchin to name what she longed for. The wise sea urchin did not name it. She pointed upwards, as far upwards as she could point. The girl swam up through the murky depths into the filtering zone into the radiant blue. She did not stop. She continued to swim upwards until her head broke through the water’s surface. There was no water up there for her to breathe. Her gills clenched shut on her.”
Mom stops talking.
“Did she die?”
“She almost died. A human rescued her by removing her skin and transforming her. She could breathe air. She could walk freely. She forgot the sea. She found happiness with the man. She found love. She found what she yearned for all of those years.”
“Is that the end?”
“No, Cassiopia. It is the middle. The end is yet to come…”
May 6, 2016 – Thanksgiving Failure
Captain gave Iron Man a beseeching look. “But what am I supposed to do with these bagged things?”
“Throw them out. Get Shwarma.”
“That does it!” Running on pure impulse power, Black Widow grabbed the turkey and flung it at Iron Man’s head. Just as Bruce Banner entered the room. “Hey, guys!”
Iron Man ducked.
The turkey slammed into Bruce’s face. “Urgh. Urrrrgh! URRRRAAAAHH!” He Hulked out, grabbed the turkey, and slammed it repeatedly into the wall.
Captain America and Iron Man watched in awestruck wonder.
By the time Black Widow rescued it, the turkey was very well tenderized. The legs just tumbled right off the body and wound up on the floor. The body looked like it had been pulled out of a car wreck.
The Hulk turned back into Bruce. He stared at the pulverized turkey. “Oh, no! What have I done?” He ran out of the kitchen in a state of deep distress.
Captain sighed. “I’ll go calm him down.” He wandered off with the three bags of gizzards still in his hands….
May 8, 2016 – Mariner
I am Mariner. I wake up each morning and stand on the jagged bow of HRM Quazzino. I close my eyes and feel the silence around me. The silence is tinged with old sorrow and long-forgotten deaths and despair. Some are human. Some are not.
The silence lasts half-way through the morn. Then, the ships and boats and jetskis come alive, groaning and creaking. It is a dirge for those who were lost. I know each word, each note of that unhummable tune.
It is my signal to begin my explorations. I travel from boats to ships to canoes to jetskis. Some are named. Some are not. Some are made of steel and crusted metal. Some are coarse wood that the water has warped and softened and aged. They are all my companions, my routine, my route.
I travel all over their shattered ruins, searching and watching for what is new. Most days and years pass without any discoveries.
Today, however, I made a discovery…
May 12, 2016 – Peter’s Wish
“I wish I had a friend.” He regretted the words as soon as he said them. “It is but a silly wish.” he said. “For who would want to befriend someone like me?”
The star twinkled for a moment, almost like a child’s giggle, before dropping from the sky.
The boy was in the midst of a thought of it being just a meteor, when the star raced towards his window, shining oh so bright and fierce.
He backed away from the window as fast as he could until his chair bumped hard against his bed.
The star flew through the window….
May 18, 2016 – Look. Don’t Touch!
Oh, speaking of avoiding behavior…He refused to touch me. No hand holding. No “accidental” foot bumping. I didn’t think it was that big of a deal. He was just being first date polite. Bravo to him for being a gentleman.
Next date: No physical contact.
Next date: Nada.
Next date: See all of the above.
Maybe he wasn’t attracted to me. But why would he date me if he wasn’t attracted to me? Guys can’t be that illogical. There had to be some reason for it.
There had to be.
I had to find out.
I wanted him to touch me, darn it!
May 29, 2016 – A Thin Comfort
I sat in between the newly married couple. She tsked and he scowled. They wanted to snuggle and hug and kiss and heaven only knows what else and I was in their way. But I had a job to do. So, I did it.
I left them and sat next to a greasy haired teenager with a broken iPhone. He held out his phone to me and asked if I knew how to fix it. I never did answer his question.
Then, I sat next to a woman. She sat alone with a baby cradled in her arms. She looked at that baby as if it were her only treasure and her greatest joy. I knew her. I knew her history. I knew why she was all alone.
I knew which one I had to take…
June 2, 2016 – Mr. Jiggles, Loan Officer
“Oh, so you are stupid. I knew it all along. Could you please get me someone who knows what he’s doing?”
“Actually, he’s coming to talk to you right now.”
“Good. Why don’t you get your itty-bitty self out of here?”
“But…this is my office.”
“You think I care about that?”
“No. I don’t think you do.”
“HELLLLLOOOOOO, EVERYONE!” Jeremy walked over to Ms. Glothenstroth. His kayak-sized shoes slap-slap-slapped with every step.
She gave him a condescending look. “Who invited Bozo?”
Jeremy grinned. “I’m not Bozo.” He leaned forward into her space and whispered, “That name’s been trademarked. Can’t use it at all.”
She backed away from him and managed to stomp on Calvin’s foot in the process.
“I am—” He spun in a circle and extended his arms in a ta-da! position. “—Mister Jehosaphat Jiggles and I am here to help you out with your loan, you lovely fat thing you.”…
June 10, 2016 – Letters to Euturpe – Orpheus In His Car
Music fills the air. Rich, warm violin music that sings of peace. Cellos that can break your heart. Soft, gentle woodwinds that speak of lost love. I know I should stay in my car, but the music pulls and tugs at me and I can’t resist.
I get out of the car and walk to the center of the room. The music fills me with comfort and joy. Yet, tears stream down my face and I don’t even know why.
I close my eyes and let the music tide and pull around me.
Until it is gone…
July 10, 2016 – Letters to Euturpe – Sail On, Silver Girl
Mildred had three great loves: her mother, reading, and music. Music was her passion. She would listen to her mother’s cds and read the liner notes as if she had to memorize them. Nothing disappointed her more than a cd without liner notes. She would scowl and bash her fist on the jewel case. Yet, an angry look or a harsh word from her mother was all that it took to make her stop.
She loved her mother in silence with joyful smiles and heartfelt hugs.
And her mother loved her. She held close to her heart the words of her guidance counselor, “This little one will have a powerful voice” and she believed in them…
August 10, 2016 – Painting a Portrait Of Her
I’m painting her portrait.
It isn’t easy. I need the right lighting. I need to be in the right mood. I need to have the right music playing in the background.
But all of that is just avoidance behavior. I will paint her portrait.
And I will stop procrastinating.
I close my eyes and there! There she is. Radiant and laughing. I can see her so clearly. And there she is.
I open my eyes and I begin.
A nervous, uncertain line that I must erase. She was many things except uncertain. So, the lines in her portrait must mirror that. Must mirror her clear certainty of life and of everything.
September 4, 2016 – Daily Prompt – Eclipsed
Standing on the stage. Fear tearing holes in her intestines. Heart pounding. Sweat percolating on her brow. Then, she would step into the spotlight and the fear would fly away. She would sparkle and shine. She was beautiful, but performing made her feel beautiful.
It was everything to her. So, she gave it her all every single time.
And they loved her for it.
Loved her with applause. Standing ovations. Bundles of roses. Mad, crazy proposals.
She raised her head and gazed at her reflection. There was nothing but darkness behind her.
“I made a mistake.” Her voice was warm and rich and hypnotic. It was a voice that could steal your heart and snap it in two….
September 27, 2016 – Letters To Euturpe: The Doll Faced Man
The doll-faced man followed the woman in the billowy red dress into the desert.
He followed her unwillingly. For she held a strange magic over him that compelled him to go anywhere and everywhere with her.
She knew this.
Yet, he was not allowed to get too close. He was not allowed to touch. For one touch would be enough to break her bond on him. And he would be free.
She knew this as well.
He yearned to beg for his freedom, but his lips were forevermore sealed…
November 9, 2016 – You’ve Got To Hide Your Love Away
A diaphanous veil lands soft on her head. It cascades light, like light, like breath, upon her shoulders. Rosette patterned lace hugs her shoulders and trails down her arms. Her fingers are long and bare. No costume jewelry decorates them. Not today.
She swallows hard and presses her hands against her corseted stomach. The butterflies fly free and wild inside of her and there is no place for them to settle.
She wishes they would settle. She wishes they would dry out and die like autumn leaves.
She can visualize them spiraling down in a death race. Which will win? Who will hit the ground? Who will remain in the air?
She knows that he will be there. He. Him. The man she loved. The man she rejected. The man that she would not say wedding vows to today or tomorrow….
December 3, 2016 – Mystery Box
I turned on my porch light.
And I saw it.
A box unlike any other box I’d ever seen.
A box made out of interlocking white and purple lilac petals.
Oh! Well. This was a surprise indeed.
I carefully picked it up.
It was so soft and beautiful in my hands. I almost cried.
But then I heard that sound again.
Oh, but it was a strange sound.
Yet, it was a familiar sound.
It was a sound that I’ve missed hearing in my many years of city life.
It was the soft, hopeful sound of life trying to break free, trying so hard to break out of its cold hard shell….
December 19, 2016 – Wanted: Pumpkin Pie
Tony Stark is bringing a shwarma turkey. I have no idea what that means. But he kept insisting on it and insisting on it. Until Bruce Banner told him he could.
Bruce is a really chill guy. I like him a lot. I’ve never seen him get angry about anything. So chill!
Tony…Well. Tony’s Tony. I won’t say that I don’t like him. I like everyone! But Tony has a…uhhhh, challenging personality. That’s what I’m calling it. Challenging! Yes!
Ohh, let’s see. Who else is going to be there? Umm, Natasha’s coming. Yeah. Natasha. She’s nice. And pretty. And hot. And I hope Mary Jane doesn’t see this. Mary Jane, if you see this, just know that you are the bestest! Mean it so much! Love love love!
Captain America’s gonna be there too. I know he has a real name, but come on! He’s Captain America! If that were my superhero name (not that I am a superhero. I’m not. Noooope. Not. Yeah.), I would never use my real name. Not ever again. If I got married, my wife would be Mrs. Mary Jane Captain America….
And that is where I’ll stop. 😀 There were some stories I really wanted to include but had to leave out. Otherwise, this would have been a crazy long post. Hope you enjoyed the quick look back.