Space Jam On Toast

“You should have space jam on toast.”

“NO.”

“You really should have space jam on roast.”

“No.”

“It tastes good. It tastes fine, if you have space jam on toast with a jar of wine.”

“NO. It is not happening. Not today. Not tomorrow. Not in a galactic week.”

….

“You should have space jam on toast. You really should give it a try.”

“No. No. No! NO! I do not want to try space jam on toast on a roast or with French Roast coffee.”

“How about with a pint of Miller Lite?”

“No.”

“A cup of milk?”

“Oh, heck no. I do not want to try space jam on toast.”

“How about inside a van? You’d like it there for sure.”

“NO. I would not like space jam on toast on a roast with wine with Miller Lite with a cup of milk inside a van. I do not like space jam on toast, Sam I Am.”

“Well. That just too bad. That’s just too sad. Here. Open your mouth and jam it in.”

“NO! I ahofahfiaphasihfaisfaps! Plah! Plah! Bleagh! I DO NOT LIKE SPACE JAM ON TOAST! I DO NOT LIKE IT JAMMED INTO MY MOUTH! GO AWAY, SAM I AM!”

“Aww. How about if I shared it with you? Would you like it then? Yes. Oh, yes. I’m sure you would like it then.”

“NO. Go.”

“What if I put it on a fishing spear? Would you like it then?”

“No. That is horrible and gross and unclean. And now the space jam on toast smells like fish. NO. Just no.”

“Hm.”

“What are you doing??! You can’t wash that with soap! Are you trying to poison me??”

“Well! Now it doesn’t smell like fish anymore. Here! Have some space jam on toast. You’ll like it. You’ll love it. You’ll….Huh? Huh? HUH??? YOU TRASHED IT!!!”

“Duh. You washed it with Palmolive soap and scrubbed it with Comet. There’s no way I’m eating that. Not ever. Go away, Sam I Am.”

“Hmmm. I’ll have to whip up a new batch. I’ll be back later today. See ya then! And you will eat space jam on toast and you will love it.” *wink* “I guarantee it.”

April Writing Prompts

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