In The Crowd

I see her every day, but not when I’m walking alone. It’s always when I’m out with my friends. Or when I’m at the mall.

I see her.

Weaving in and out of the crowd, she’ll stop and look at me. Her expression is neutral. There’s no clues for me to read into. I have no idea why she looks at me.

But she does.

She’s always too far out of my reach. I never can find the courage to approach her. Maybe I think she’ll disappear. Or maybe I think she’s Death waiting for me to surrender.

I’m not ready to die.

I’m not willing to surrender.

But whenever I walk through crowds on the street or at the mall or at church, I look for her. I watch for her.

I hope for her.

And she appears.

Whoever or whatever she is, she always appears in a crowd.

Maybe one day I’ll find the courage to chase her. Maybe I’ll give in and call out to her. When I do, I will call out her name. Somehow, in that moment, I will know her name.

I feel like she already knows mine.

I feel like she knows me. She knows everything about me.

But maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I’m just being paranoid.

Maybe she is nothing at all.

Just a wish.

Just a dream.

Just a hallucination running always in the crowd.

August Writing Prompts

4 thoughts on “In The Crowd

  1. Love this story. I really wonder who is the one that you see but don’t know the name of. Interesting that you said that maybe she’s Death waiting for me to surrender. It makes you think that we’re not ready to die. But death after all is apart of life. Everyone who is born in this world dies one day. Sometimes death happens suddenly. I should know because our family just lost my mom’s best friend. She suddenly passed away one morning in June and the saddest part is that she was alone at home because her husband went to the pharmacy to get her some medicine because she wasn’t feeling well. Keep up the great work. Please if you have a chance please check out my blog.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That is so tragic! There really isn’t a good way to lose someone you love. If it’s a long disease, it gives you a chance to settle things and say goodbye but there’s that pain of seeing them slowly slip away. If it’s a sudden thing like a car accident or what happened to your mom’s best friend, it’s a comfort to know that they didn’t get a chance to suffer but it also robs you of that chance to say goodbye. It is a very difficult thing either way.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It was a long disease but she never told anyone and then she was gone. I just wish I could have had a chance to say goodbye. I never got to say goodbye to the two aunts and two uncles that I have lost in the past decade.

        Liked by 1 person

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